Sunday, October 21, 2012

Grateful for new friends

This happened Tuesday.  It has taken me this long to write about it -- every time I start, I get choked up.

Jude avoids people, at almost any cost.  When he was in preschool, he spent most of his days in time out. When we asked him why was he fighting and misbehaving, his response was "So that everyone would leave me alone."  I was astonished; not only had he figured out how to work the system, he was using it so that he could be left alone.  When we have had family over for holidays, he hides in my bedroom.  At first he would stay away as long as the iPad battery held out; eventually he got wise enough to take the charger with him.  Last Christmas, I asked him if was going to come down to eat.  He asked if people were still here.  When I said they were, he said he wasn't coming down and went back into the bedroom.  He's not a "people person."

Tuesday, I had an abundance of happy tears.  We had been to the hospital for Damien's pre-op visit, and Jude was exceptionally well behaved during the exam.  I'll grant you he had his nose in his iPad the entire morning, but he sat so quietly that the nurses even remarked how well-behaved he was.  As a reward, I asked Jude if he wanted to spend a few minutes on the playground before we left.  There is a large Carillon on the grounds that chimes every fifteen minutes.  I knew it was about to chime any moment, so I said we could stay until the bell rang for the second time.  I was sitting and watching him, with a drowsy Damien in the stroller.  Jude was climbing all over the equipment by himself.  Suddenly, I heard two voices distinct through the general chatter, then saw two boys playing. 

I did what any non-stalker mom would do.  I texted my husband a play-by-play and took pictures. (Jude is the one in the polar bear hoodie.)

I never got a chance to talk to Joseph's mom - she took a phone call and then they had to leave.  But I'll say here what I wish I could have then:

Mrs. Joseph's Mom,

Thank you for stopping at the playground on Tuesday.  I'm sure you saw your son invite mine to play,  and for a couple of 5-year-olds on a playground, it seems pretty insignificant.  But your little boy saying, "Come slide with me," was a big deal, because THIS time, mine finally said "OK."  He actually played with another child that he wasn't related to, and then found the desire and confidence to approach another child alone on the playground.  You have an awesome kid.  I hope you're not there as often as we are, but I hope someday we are there again at the same time and the boys can play.    Thank you for teaching your son to be a friend.

Jude's Mom

Blogging Through the Alphabet I'm sharing this with my friends at Blogging through the Alphabet.  See what everyone else has happening this week.


  1. Wow, what a great story! Just goes to show that you never know how the "little things" that we do can turn out to be so meaningful -- bet that mom has no idea that she helped usher in such a big event in Jude's life.

    This is my first time at your blog, but I'll definitely be back to see what else you're talking about! Thanks for stopping by my blog (Eileen on Him ... at least I try!). I haven't found the time to blog at all this year, but I'm glad my archives can be helpful! Stop by any time. :)


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